Dazed and Confused
by Nephyrwynn
Summary: He intimated feelings in my gut that I never read in a book or felt for that matter.... Draco Malfoy is the object of Hermione's deepest hatred. When she becomes obsessed all hell breaks loose....A good read, How do you Like your Draco?
1. Default Chapter

**_Disclaimer :Yada Yada these characters aren't mine. All Harry Potter characters are the intellectual Property of J.K Rowling and Associates- Please review HEHEHE on with the story... Ps how do you like your Draco?_**

Dazed and Confused

The greatest love in the world lies in the heart of every woman. Hidden in the deep ocean of her mind are the scents, memories and tastes of unbridled passion. Every cold exterior has a cold fire burning at its core, an ember that stays and never dies until it is snuffed.

I have known such love, as well as such hate.d Its amazing how one can have the capacity to love so much and in that same heart hold the very reins of the deepest hate.He was beautiful, and dangerous; the kind of man that could hold you and enrapture you in his eyes. The gun-metal grey of his eyes wrought fires in my being that I thought long dead.

. In my younger years those same eyes haunted my dreams in the throes of my deepest hate. He was the devil in the most wonderfully crafted form, and he was secretly mine. I owned him, I possessed him in the chambers of my mind, and it was my little secret, but not for long.

I graduated from Hogwarts a liberated woman. No one could think that I, Hermione Granger could stand alone. The war ruined a lot of people. By the time I graduated, more than half of the students at Hogwarts could see the thestrals. Countless orphans were now wards of the Ministry. War has a way of sobering everybody it touches.

I knew that I lost my best friend, my sanity. Torture is a wonderful thing in front of Voldemort, the thing is a sadist, and I bet he got off on it. That was the worst for me. I remember it vividly… like it was yesterday.

I still wake up in a cold sweat when I think of his putrid breath next to my skin. Three weeks I was tortured, every light in my life slowly snuffed. My dignity stripped me to the state of a newborn. The cold floor still scratches my bruised skin, but most of all the voices, the terrible voices…

_There's a razor blade… just one swipe_

_Your blood is tainted… drain it Granger… Drain it…._

_You can't hide … its so easy just one jump…._

It's amazing how many ways you can figure to hurt yourself… I even thought of paper cutting myself to death to get out of there… my heart cried in the darkness of those three weeks…

"Harry, Harry… why have you forgotten me?"

"Harry, save me"

I muttered his name like he was god; he didn't exist in that place.

"What are you calling that worthless name for, Filth" a voice in the darkness questioned me

"Why should I tell you?"

"I am your god, I can gut you like swine if I so pleased"

"You couldn't catch a fly with your wand in charms what makes you think that you can do that"

That sinister laugh was in the dark half-hidden in the shadows and echoed by the stone.

"It's a wonder you've survived this long, we got something special for you Granger."

"Oh please let it be the shutting up of your mouth, as if there couldn't be anything more disgusting than Voldemort in this place"

He swooped onto me pursing my lips with his cold hands

"There is nothing in this world that I would enjoy more, now I hope you have fun, enjoy our hospitality; by the way here is a little gift from me to you"

The asshole gave me a dead flower with a razor blade attached …

I don't know how I did it… everyday I became stronger in my resolve, I found hope in little things, the bird that would flit at the top of the stairwell… the little family of rats that had made a nest in the abandoned mattress.

My graduation from Hogwarts was bittersweet. I saw that asshole everyday in potions. I shot daggers with my eyes every chance I got. They never convicted him even though I saw him there. It was a little game we played with each other. Indeed we became very intimate during my 3 week stay. But not the kind of intimacy one would think. I was one of the lucky ones not to have been killed. I guess I was much more valuable alive. When I was rescued I had given them everything they thought they needed.

Malfoy was the only company I had in that god-forsaken place. They must have done it on purpose. Now you might think that I would want to keep him away from me, oh no. I was obsessed. I wanted to hear his voice every night when he brought me to Voldemort. I wanted to burn in my hatred for him. I was consumed. He intimated feelings in my gut that I never knew existed or ever read in a book.

It was funny how he would talk to me. It was a sadistic little game we liked to play with each other, He would tell me how many ways he could kill me while I told him how many ways he was inept.

In the beginning I cried a little, I'm only human. I asked for the usual my mother, god, mercy, Harry, Ron… anything. Draco couldn't stand my crying. So he'd laugh but we never touched. He never laid his hands on me… he was simply the messenger.

I think my favorite part of the whole torture process was Voldemort's twisted version of the Yule Ball. He can trick your mind into seeing things that aren't there.

I was taken to a tattered ball room wearing a sumptuous set of dress robes, I felt sick to my stomach wearing that cold thing.

I was tricked into seeing the dead bodies of everyone I loved at the tables. While Voldemort sat directly across me at dinner.

It was a date with Satan. Our main course was worms on rotten meat; he liked to say that it was Neville Longbottom's rump. None of it could've been real...

_Where is Potter?_

_What is he planning?_

_What is his secret weapon?_

_You want you to tell me everything…_

"SCREW YOU VOLDEMORT…."

_Arvada Ke..._

"I'll handle it master"

It was dizzying, intoxicating in its breadth. The room whirled around with sounds penetrating my ears. I was dancing, I told my body to stop but it went dancing to its own music…

_Imperio_

I was dancing with Malfoy; my skin crawled and shivered in disgust.

I'm going mad I thought… a little voice in my head urged me to spill everything about Harry, it urged my feet to dance as well.

"I told you we had worse plans for you mudblood"

"I will kill you, mark my words, it will be by my hands or my doing Malfoy"……

…..

What'd ya think well just leave a review so I can have some encouragement to continue. I really hope ya'll like it and give me some constructive criticism. Remember 1 minute of review 3 hours of happiness for me! More to come tomorrow!


	2. Dazed

Disclaimer: Yada yada I don't own it.. I know

**Chapter 2: Expire**

That little interlude of ours marked the beginning of something rancid, for 5 years to the day I will remember that. Naturally, by some miracle, I was saved. By what I heard there was a fault in Voldemort's plan. I could give a shit less what his fault was, I just wanted to inhale the scent of Malfoy.

I came back to Hogwarts eerily quiet. Most people thought me mad, but I couldn't care. As far as I was concerned, I was alive. Something in me changed. The hallways now held a vibrating luster as if each stone in it were alive with life. I was tingled by the vibrations of every word spoken in the corridors. Colors, once dull, were now resplendent with life.

I couldn't explain it. I still had many of my old desires which included reading, getting my grades caught up and SPEW. However, I had a new pastime, one that satisfied me on a level deeper than any school subject. Watching Malfoy was a new hobby. It was disgusting I admit but thoroughly enjoyable. Some call it obsession, others will call it sick, I call it fun.

There was an advantage to me being a prefect; I could get closer to Malfoy alone. I must have an obsessive compulsive disorder. I would count him chewing 8 times always; he has a particular nervous twitch which causes him to scratch at his elbows. He scratches the left when he is thinking and the right when he is animated. I could count 6 visible freckles on his cheeks and of course that vile forearm that would never be displayed. Nobody ever caught onto my escapades, I was very clever in my looks and calculated glances.

I guess the system worked because Malfoy never seemed to notice… at least till one night.

I clicked through the halls trying to find my midnight adventure, into the prefect's bathroom I went. Lavender choked the balmy air. Then I felt my body falling to the ground, the whole time knowing I didn't trip.

"12:09 am, You sure are predictable Granger."

The voice slipped into the steamy air, by now my nightgown was moist from the bathtub's steam.

"You know, you always were a creature of habit Granger, most interesting about you is the way you sleep, you see normally you sleep on your back , usually dominant and brave people sleep that way… However, you have a curious way of curling into a ball when ever I would be in the room for seven minutes".

"How do you know that?" I murmured keeping it cool, I couldn't really see in the dark…

"I know a lot of things about you", the voice was now on my ear.

I felt weak, the world stopped at the moment I realized and the moment I knew. I felt a gentle pressure on my neck.

"So soft and yielding this spot is Granger, so many times I just savored doing this..." there was a new moisture on my neck, it was smooth and cool at the same time.

"Why is that? Hmm?" I choked back

" So much power can be yielded by this little spot, it has the ability to pleasure you like this…" His deft lips worked the tender spot of my collar bone while he thumbed my throat, "Or it can control you and snuff you out..."

I couldn't breathe I refused to fight since I was entranced. I felt like the paralyzed prey of a great predator…

The hotness was next to my ear again as I silently choked " Your pink lips will blue and your supple body shall marble gray and purple as you slowly rot to your sublime death, you're lucky I took a liking to you, Granger. It could be a lot quicker and gruesome but I think you deserve better"

Again I felt the alien pressure on my neck, my lungs now burned for air.

"What a nice headstone it will be. Hermione Granger, Mudblood and divine creature, you know if only your blood wasn't tainted I would have had you, all of you" He was laughing, laughing as I slowly expired on the prefect bathroom floor…

More to come, (I know its short) wrote it in half an hour lemme know how ur liking this and what you'd like to see !


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